Reflections

Catalyst

• By Abel
• January 9, 2015
• No Comments

It’s just as easy for me to form a positive thought as it is for me to think about all that is not going the way I would like. I realized this yesterday as I was leaving work and brooding about how unfulfilled I was feeling. As I descended the steps into the parking lot where my car sat waiting for me faithfully I switched my thoughts to hopes for the future and to the list I had made earlier that day of the things I could control in my life and how focusing on these things would make me feel. “Thoughts” and “emotions” were listed sandwiched between “how much I exercise” and “how much time I spend writing”. Instantly I was in a better place – such a simple fix to break free from an impending funk. Next to the words “thoughts” and “emotions” I’d listed that I would feel more positive, calmer, more focused, less stressed, happier, and more in control. At that moment my shifting thoughts were instant proof.

I think the hard part of breaking out of negative mind patterns is teaching ourselves that endlessly thinking about all that is wrong in our lives doesn’t buy us what we seek. Investing in negativity and negative self-talk does not yield a happier more productive person; in fact, it produces the opposite. The more we focus on the negative the further down a spiral into despair we fall.

Yesterday’s exercise of picking an area of my life to focus on and to control came out of my desire to feel useful and purposeful despite being stuck in an unhappy work environment. In 2012 I completed this same exercise while working at a job where I was not given the opportunity to apply all my skills and experience. I felt overqualified and underwhelmed with the assignments given to me. I was stagnating like a pool of standing water-a perfect breeding ground for harmful unwanted parasites to corrupt and cloud my thinking and propel me headlong into a dark malaise. In response I decided to tackle controlling the foods and how much of them I consumed. This was something I had complete control over. Nobody was force feeding me food. So I joined Weight Watchers and set myself on a course for healthier eating. And in 13 months I dropped 75 pounds. How liberating! And three years later I’m still enjoying the benefits of taking control of that area of my life.

This year I’m in a different job at a different company, but once again I find myself feeling unfulfilled. I was reminded of something Stuart Wilde said (I’m paraphrasing here): ‘If you want to feel challenged, challenge yourself! If you want to feel motivated, motivate yourself!’ What I want is to feel fulfilled and valuable in spite of my current work situation. So this year I’m setting out to control my thoughts and therefore my emotions. After all I’ve proven to myself that investing in negativity doesn’t buy me happiness. And I’m getting so excited thinking about my future. When I’m successful at controlling my thoughts and emotions this year, what benefits will I continue to reap years after this initial impetus has passed?

Photo Credit: George Alexander Ishida Newman