Reflections

Beware

• By fannieb
• May 25, 2017
• No Comments

Beware of taking advice from people who are not where you want to be, who are not living life the way you want to live it, and who are not clear on who you are and what’s important to you, even if they seem to be well-intentioned.

Today I met with a friend over coffee.  She clearly had her own agenda and motivation for meeting with me. On that agenda was to get me to see the opportunities I wasn’t taking advantage of.  Opportunities she would pounce on. She had some valid points and others that felt like outright pressure.  I got the impression she thinks there is only one way to reach “success” and I was missing the boat.  It was clear she had no idea of what my goals were and what I considered success.  This meeting that was supposed to be enjoyable, did not feel good, even though I know she was trying to help me.

The simple fact is that unless you can let go of your own goals and your own definition of success and find out what the other persons are, you might be ineffective at best and kill a good relationship at worst.  This is coaching 101 – hold the clients agenda.  This goes for friendships too, don’t “should” on your friends!

The lesson I learned today is to 1) gut check the energy of a person I’m meeting with at the start of every interaction and 2) be clear on who I am, what’s important to me, and my definition of success!  If I do these two things, I can avoid the pull of self-doubt and eliminate the chance I will do something that is simply not right for me.

Photo Credit: Celine Nadeau