Reflections

Breaking through

• By fannieb
• October 24, 2015
• No Comments

Just because someone annoys you doesn’t mean you can’t learn from them. Just because someone disconcerts you doesn’t mean they can’t learn from you. And, just because someone seems to be unconcerned with others doesn’t mean you won’t make a deep, heartwarming, and memorable connection with them.

I learned this firsthand yesterday afternoon when I unexpectedly ran into my former boss, Daniel, in the hallway at work. Every time I see him a wave of animus flutters through my heart as I muster up the appropriate countenance and smile. He’s the kind of guy who I might not feel so averse to if I didn’t have to work with him and feel the condescension of his tone and remarks in meetings; he’s friendly with a sometimes crazy but lovable grin at other times.

But yesterday as we passed in the hallway we spoke and he asked me of my plans for the weekend. When I returned the question he told me that his wife was going to visit her dying sister in Delaware and that he would be home alone for the weekend. He added that it was sad that his sister-in-law was ill, but that we all have our time. I agreed and said, “that’s true, but it still changes us.”

Then Daniel tried to quote a line from the Tennyson poem Ulysses but couldn’t quite remember it saying something like “a part of us becomes the people we meet”. I agreed once again responding, “And, ‘we can never cross the same river twice because the river has changed, and we have changed.’”

We parted wishing each other a good weekend and that was that, or so I thought. I went out for my afternoon walk and when I returned there was an email from him with the subject line “poem” and the body of the email contained the text of the poem Ulysses with the line he had tried to remember but had botched highlighted: “I am part of all that I have met;”.  After I had read the whole poem I thought to myself, I can’t believe it. I’m longing to be understood and find connection and I’ve made one with someone I would least want or expect it with.

But, since I have grown by leaps and bound spiritually over the last year, I hesitate to cast this connection aside. Resisting and holding grudges is restrictive and I’m finding it can block blessings. I’m grateful for this experience and interaction. And, once again I am changed.

Photo Credit: Mark Dixon